From left: Yudhoyono, Megawati Sukarnoputri, Jusuf Kalla.

Kid: It’s a festival of democracy, right dad? So how come they smile at each other on TV but criticise each other behind their backs?

Father: It’s a masquerade party, don’t you know!

In stark contrast to the petty point scoring and mudslinging that has characterised the presidential election, candidates spent most of the first televised debate joking and complimenting each other.